Friday, July 07, 2006
Current mood: relieved
I just got back from the Manager's house. My god that guy wasn't lying when he said he really REALLY loved Baxter Investigates...
As I walked up the path to his front door I could see myself looking out from his living room window. For a second I thought I had gone out of my tiny mind until I realized it was one of those completely pointless full-size cardboard cut-outs that people sell online and in comic shops. It was a publicity shot from Baxter Investigates... Again! that would have been erected in video stores if Baxter Investigates... Again! had ever made it into video stores...
Current mood: relieved
I just got back from the Manager's house. My god that guy wasn't lying when he said he really REALLY loved Baxter Investigates...
As I walked up the path to his front door I could see myself looking out from his living room window. For a second I thought I had gone out of my tiny mind until I realized it was one of those completely pointless full-size cardboard cut-outs that people sell online and in comic shops. It was a publicity shot from Baxter Investigates... Again! that would have been erected in video stores if Baxter Investigates... Again! had ever made it into video stores...
I rang the bell and almost passed out when the door was opened to reveal the manager therein dressed from head to toe in a full replica costume of Geno Magee from Baxter Investigates... Again! And he insisted on talking in the voice too. Bernard Goldsmith who played Geno would be spinning in his grave... if he was dead.
So the scene was set. I was sat on the guy's sofa with him sitting rather too closely next to me. He raised his hand, and for a moment I was very slightly worried, until he picked up the control and started the VCR. He had selected Baxter Investigates... Cheap Frills. The very episode in which I dragged up to go undercover. Not my finest moment but this fella said it was his favorite episode.
He leant over, "Commentate."
"Huh?"
"Commentate. On the episode." he said.
"Ohhh, Sure... Erm well... these are the titles..."
"Not good enough." he interrupted.
"Sorry?"
"I want to know every detail of the production"
"I can't remember it all that well. The knickers were a bit constricting. I remember that"
"Thats nice imagery, but still not good enough..."
Suddenly my cell-phone rang, and I answered it in lightning speed time. "Hello? Oh really? No. Well yeh sure I'll be home right away..."
"Who was that", he said suspiciously.
"My wife. Er... Her mother has spontaneously combusted. We need to get over there right away and put her out."
"Of her misery?"
"Put out the flames"
"You sure you're not just making that up?"
"Noooooooo. I'd love to stay here but you understand I'll have to go."
And before he could say another word I was out of there like a raccoon from a bazooka. I've never been so glad of a phone call in all my life. Good job I asked my Wife to call at a pre-arranged time, just in case things got bad. Trouble was, she forgot and it was actually a wrong number! Of all the luck! I think my Wife can buy the groceries from now on. I am not stepping foot anywhere near that fruit cake ever again. Although I have a funny feeling I was followed home...
Currently listening : Still by Tony Banks. Release date: By 13 March, 2001
10:47 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment
He leant over, "Commentate."
"Huh?"
"Commentate. On the episode." he said.
"Ohhh, Sure... Erm well... these are the titles..."
"Not good enough." he interrupted.
"Sorry?"
"I want to know every detail of the production"
"I can't remember it all that well. The knickers were a bit constricting. I remember that"
"Thats nice imagery, but still not good enough..."
Suddenly my cell-phone rang, and I answered it in lightning speed time. "Hello? Oh really? No. Well yeh sure I'll be home right away..."
"Who was that", he said suspiciously.
"My wife. Er... Her mother has spontaneously combusted. We need to get over there right away and put her out."
"Of her misery?"
"Put out the flames"
"You sure you're not just making that up?"
"Noooooooo. I'd love to stay here but you understand I'll have to go."
And before he could say another word I was out of there like a raccoon from a bazooka. I've never been so glad of a phone call in all my life. Good job I asked my Wife to call at a pre-arranged time, just in case things got bad. Trouble was, she forgot and it was actually a wrong number! Of all the luck! I think my Wife can buy the groceries from now on. I am not stepping foot anywhere near that fruit cake ever again. Although I have a funny feeling I was followed home...
Currently listening : Still by Tony Banks. Release date: By 13 March, 2001
10:47 PM - 0 Comments - 0 Kudos - Add Comment
No comments:
Post a Comment